Chapter 6. Vision

A vision is a picture of the future that a person or couple strives for. It helps set the direction and build a strategy for change. It is important to distinguish fantasies from a vision: a vision must take into account real conditions and needs to be achievable and useful.

1. Individual visions

Each partner formulates their own picture of the future. It is important to write in the first person: “I want…”, “I see myself…”. An individual vision reflects personal needs, dreams, and goals. Even if they do not fully coincide, acknowledging these visions is important for understanding each other’s inner world.

2. Partner’s vision as seen by the other

A helpful practice is to describe how you imagine your partner’s vision. For example: “I think it is important for you…”. This helps reveal misunderstandings and assess how well you know one another.

3. Joint vision

After both partners share their visions, a joint picture of the future is created. It includes a common core (what matches) and room for differences (what remains personal). A joint vision should be both realistic and inspiring.

4. Recognition of personal goals and fantasies

Not all personal dreams and fantasies can be realized. However, recognizing them matters: they show values and desires. The fantasy “a house by the sea” may express the value of “calm and space”. Such values can be considered when creating a joint vision, even if the dream itself remains personal.

5. Comparison and synthesis of visions

Comparing visions helps reveal:

• Overlaps (common core, basis for the future).
• Differences (where to seek compromise or preserve what is personal).

The synthesized vision of the couple includes the common core and a respectful acknowledgment of differences. This forms a sense of union without losing individuality.

Conclusion

A vision is a guideline, not a rigid plan. It sets direction and inspires, yet allows changes as conditions and needs evolve.